REBT course

graham nichols

REBT (Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy) Practitioner Certification - Beginner to Professional


Rational Emotive Behaviour Therapy, REBT, is a type of therapy that tries to recognise irrational beliefs and thoughts that may be negative, maybe even self degrading and turn them around in a person to help them achieve their potential. These kinds of thoughts usually hold a person back in doing anything and have to be addressed. Introduced by Albert Ellis in the 1950s it has been used by therapists to help many people.

The ABC of REBT

REBT works on the principle that certain emotive behaviours are triggered or activated A. A person has many preconceived notions or beliefs B because of his or her upbringing and environment. And the resulting behaviour or consequences C.

ABC
activation
belief
consequence

Activation

Somebody activates your thinking by an emotional event which is when you start believing possible irrational beliefs and the consequences are that you think you can or cannot do something.

Pre requisites and pre supposition

There are a certain number of prerequisites that one has to keep in mind. These presuppositions are that it human beings are fallible but not broken.

Flexibility of thought.

Your thoughts must be flexible. One should not limit him or herself to certain notions.

Reactionary type of behavior means that you do not act or initiate but react to everything. 

Human beings are fallible but not broken

None of your clients are broken. 

Accepting ourselves and situations

Don't judge others. Give space and opportunity.

 Good Psychological and mental health. 

No making excuses and blaming others

UnConditional acceptance

Changing irrational beliefs

Challenge beliefs to change. 

Core rational

Change is not in therapy room

Clients will have to change themselves

Communication

You cannot fix anybody

If you want more - take more action that allow you to do it.

Distinction of Good emotional health

Take responsibility of your own behaviour

Discover the joy in taking calculated risks

Therapeutic relationship

Freud personality emotion model

Emotional mind

ID - people who don't care

Self worth - high

Intelligent mind

Ego-good moral and values

Intelligent mind

Calculated risk

Analytical mind

Super ego

Can't do this and that

Over analyse

Self worth - low

Albert Ellis??

Labelling people and box people as someone - depressed, ADHD, Libran

Responsibility is the ability to respond

Emotional mind

Intelligent mind

Analytical mind

Consequences of ABC

Section 5

People talk about consequences first

Expecting to be treated fairly like we want to treat others

Unhealthy negative emotions

Anger, anxiety, stress etc.

Healthy anger can help you change, but unhealthy anger will not help you change

Emotional consequence - overthinking

Meta emotional consequences - where are we going

Limiting beliefs - maybe because of experience

Note to self: add business and investing in your syllabus - also invest in your self - what is investing? 

Meta model - NLP

Activation and triggers - what triggers delimitation?

Situational activation and critical activation

Events that create emotions and limiting ideas eg. Someone's death or some event that happened years ago

Perpetuating beliefs

Perpetuating rational beliefs

Negative and inflexible beliefs

Taking concious decisions

Repetition creates skills - also creates confidence

Trying to find approval of everybody - not possible.

Do you want to please everyone?

I should never be angry. Is that possible?

I should never be depressed. Is that possible?

Are you good enough. Will you ever be?

Others should treat me fairly. Is that right?

Should be right every time.

Nobody should criticise me. I don't like to be corrected.

I should get what I want when I want it.

Things should always go their way.

Can't deal with situations. 

I am super human.

Helping children all the time.

Are you good enough?

You feel good enough most of the time. But when you don't you stop yourself.

The positive good enough - don't be a perfectionist.

The negative good enough - don't hold back.

Is it knowledge? Then get it.

Situational events. Getting upset at situations and events and then colouring everything negatively. 

Example all women are bad. All men cannot be trusted. All Muslims are terrorists.

Perpetuating beliefs. 

Like a box of beliefs they keep. They will not change their belief. 

If you are focusing on something and although you believe it is bad then you will never be able to avoid it even after trying.

My notes: there are 3 types of people. One who will run away from any challenge. 2 people who will fight the challenges in which they are thrown but will avoid other challenges mauve because of the comfort zones. Other who are constantly putting themselves up for challenges.

Subjective unit of distress SUD

Subjective unit of experience SUE

Albert Ellis

Do we have patterns and daily routines that hold us back.

Doing the same things but expecting different results.

Contributing selflessly

Being a role model

learning to delegate

how do leaders get problem solved. Is it their job to solve every problem or get the problem solved.

how to start working from home

Who can start writing from home

What to do you need

The heart of the tree by Henry Bunner

The summary:

The heart of the tree is a poem written by Henry Bunner, an American writer.

What does he plant who plants a tree?
He plants a friend of sun and sky;
He plants the flag of breezes free;
The shaft of beauty towering high;
He plants a home to heaven anigh;
For song and mother-croon of bird
In hushed and happy twilight heard—
The treble of heaven’s harmony—
These things he plants who plants a tree.

What does he plant who plants a tree?
He plants cool shade and tender rain,
And seed and bud of days to be,
And years that fade and flush again
He plants the glory of the plain;
He plants the forest’s heritage;
The harvest of a coming age;
The joy that unborn eyes shall see—
These things he plants who plants a tree.

What does he plant who plants a tree?
He plants in sap and leaf and wood,
In love of home and loyalty
And far-cast thought of civic good—
His blessings on the neighbourhood,
Who in the hollow of His hand
Holds all the growth of all our land—
A nation’s growth from sea to sea
Stirs in his heart who plants a tree.

The poet appreciates a person who plants a tree and through this appreciation he enumerates the benefits of planting a tree.
some of the benefits he lists are:
Trees give shade from the sun
THey are a home to birds
Trees give oxygen
trees have the potential to turn into green forests that will be a joy for coming generations.

The poem is very appropriate to our times where we are expanding our cities, cutting down trees and encroaching into the forest for the lust of urbanization.

Read the full stanza first.

What does he plant who plants a tree?
He plants a friend of sun and sky;
He plants the flag of breezes free;
The shaft of beauty towering high;
He plants a home to heaven anigh;
For song and mother-croon of bird
In hushed and happy twilight heard—
The treble of heaven’s harmony—
These things he plants who plants a tree.

the poet starts by asking the question

What does he plant who plants a tree?

Then starts answering his own question.

He plants a friend of sun and sky;

the trees usually grow upwards towards the sun and the sun is such an important part of a trees life. Also probably talking about photosynthesis here and making oxygen in the process.

he may also imply that the hot and scorching sun and the wind that can harm humans and animals become more friendly because of the trees. The trees give shade and hold the soil together.

He plants the flag of breezes free;

The poet describes the tree as a flag that flutters in the breeze. He is probably talking about trees swaying in the breeze or the leaves of the tree trembling in the wind. The trunk of the tree is the pole of the flag.

The shaft of beauty towering high;

Here he mentions the trunk by name. Towering high means tall majestic trees.

He plants a home to heaven anigh

Anigh means near.
He further describes the tree as a home near the heaven. Heaven is often used as another word for sky.

For song and mother-croon of bird

Croon means sing softly.
He builds this home for the mother bird that sings for everybody especially its children.

In hushed and happy twilight heard—

Hushed means softly and twilight means the light during sunset.
this means that during evening time when most sounds fade and you hear the happy sounds of animals, birds and insects

The treble of heaven’s harmony—

Treble means high pitched sound

Harmony usually means everyone living together without fear.

It also means a combination of sounds to make one composition of music.

These things he plants who plants a tree.

This way he lists what planting a tree means.

If you look at the stanza as a whole. Then you realize that the poet is enumerating the qualities of a tree.
He says the tree is a friend of the sun and sky.
It is like a flag fluttering in the breeze.
A flag that almost touches the sky.
A towering beauty, that is like a home near heaven.
Because like heaven it has music in it.
The music is of birds who make their nest in the tree.
and sing during the evening time when all creatures are returning to their homes.



What does he plant who plants a tree?

So the poet starts with the question again.
Maybe he wants to enumerate more qualities of the tree and list the benefits of planting a tree

He plants cool shade and tender rain,

The tree provides shade and from the sun and rain
It is interesting to note that in the second line of the first stanza the poet talks about sun and sky and here he talks about shade and rain. Shade has to be provided from the sun and rain is usually in poetic language said to fall from the skies.

And seed and bud of days to be,
as the tree grows older it bears fruit that provide seeds for new trees. And bud means new and small flowers that will helps grow more fruit through polination

And years that fade and flush again

the tree will stand the test of time and witness years that have changing seasons that will have times of rain and spring when the gardens and forests are flush with greenery and plants and summer and autumn when the plants will have little or no leaves and the fields will turn brown.

He plants the glory of the plain;

The tree is the glory of any field or plain. It has many uses in a plain one of them being holding the soil together to avoid soil erosion

He plants the forest’s heritage;

One tree has the potential to turn the area into a forest. Heritage means something that is handed down generations or that belongs to someone particular. Here the tree is owned by the forest. It belongs in the forest.

The harvest of a coming age;

As the tree will grow older and stronger it will bear fruit that future generations will be able to enjoy.

The joy that unborn eyes shall see—

There are many yet to be born and they shall be overjoyed to find a tree that is an important part of the ecosystem that thrives to keep nature alive. This line also means the future generations will enjoy the fruits of the tree.

These things he plants who plants a tree.

The stanza is looked upon as a whole suggests that the tree will stand the test of time. It will become a forest in the years to come. It will bear many fruits in the coming and going of the seasons every year. In the process it will also witness many generations of other creatures including humans, birds, animals and other plants be born. grow and die. For them it will be a thing of beauty and benefit.

What does he plant who plants a tree?
He plants in sap and leaf and wood,
In love of home and loyalty
And far-cast thought of civic good—
His blessings on the neighbourhood,
Who in the hollow of His hand
Holds all the growth of all our land—
A nation’s growth from sea to sea
Stirs in his heart who plants a tree.

What does he plant who plants a tree?
The poet once again asks the question, so that he can further elaborate the benefits of planting a tree.

He plants in sap and leaf and wood,
Sap leaf and wood are all parts of the tree. So in a way the person who plants a tree is planting all of these each of which are useful to man

In love of home and loyalty
home here could be mother earth that is home to all living creatures we know. It could also mean the home that we live in, our locality or area or country where we reside. And planting a tree is definitely going to help all the mentioned places showing the loyalty of the person.

And far-cast thought of civic good—
Far cast should mean envisioning or thinking about the future generations and the good it will do to them

His blessings on the neighbourhood,
His blessings could mean the benefits of planting a tree such as clean air and beauty in the vicinity

Who in the hollow of His hand
It is the way we hold something small. In the palm of the hand.

Holds all the growth of all our land—
He holds one seed but it is something that can grow and benefit all the land.

A nation’s growth from sea to sea
A country too can benefit from planting of trees. Sea to sea may mean border to border. In other words the whole nation. In a larger perspective sea to sea can also mean coast to coast or all of the land regardless of political borders.

Stirs in his heart who plants a tree.
Which means that any person who wants to plant trees has a kind heart that thinks of the well being of other humans.

The whole stanza could be seen as the vision of the man who plants the tree. He is planting something that will give products such as sap, wood and leaf which have different uses. The tree will give oxygen to the local population and when it multiplies into a forest it will give fruits and oxygen and other benefits to the whole nation and the earth.

brings the heaven near to earth?






heavens anigh - creates heaven nearby
answring of his own qquestion.

second stanza corresponds to the the first stanza? sun and sky - shade and rain 

the full circle of core values

Check Ramsay

comfort zone??

Core values

Core value elicitation demonstration 117

Finding out what are your vote values and priorities.

Articulating our thoughts and opinions about our life and how we live it. 

Talking about comfort zones and how we are afraid to step out of them because they mean uncertainty. People need certainty and stability. Like women who want commitment. They are looking for security. So certainty, security, stability and comfort zone becomes one and the same. 

In the one hand there are people - maybe the same people who are looking for freedom, and excitement. These people will have to take risks. And hope that what they believe comes true. Because risk taking means stepping out of your comfort zone. Walking on the roads of uncertainty, insecurity. 

But what will these guys achieve? Fulfillment, growth and excitement. They work with hope and faith. They may achieve significance. 

But they will learn for joy and intimacy. Which comes from genuine connections. For this they look for stable and secure relations. In which case they've come a full circle.

learning from other people's mistakes

Always learn from your own mistakes. Do not stop yourself from doing something because someone else doesn't feel it is the right thing to do. Does that extend to drugs and drinking. Jumping off a cliff. The suicides of the city where young people were killing themselves and it was a trend. People who failed at something in science and other people tried and succeeded.

Learning from other people's mistakes is also important. Reading books. Tried and tested methods.

The Psychology of Marketing

1. The superiority complex

The Aryan theory

The Arab theory

The white supremacy - klu Klux clan, Hitler, Christian - inquisition, the Chinese Mao ideology,  Stalin - communism,  the Japanese, babar - relating to chengis Khan, the Greek Utopia, the caste system of India, the money experiment - money the new caste

2. The authority figure

The eyes posters, the tyrant and leaders posters everywhere

3. The others

The dog and the crow, is and them, Aryans and Dravidian